It Is (Depression)It is a shroud of black velvet.
It is the violent ocean in the dead of night.
It is the monster in the shadows; the Vashta Nerada.
It is the final crash of symbols in Carmina Burana.
It is impossible to lift.
it is impossible to breathe.
It is impossible to see.
It is the only thing that can be heard.
It is why the stars disappear at night.
It is why every light drifts by without stopping.
It is why the gnawing starts and never ceases.
It is why nothing else matters in the end.
It is my disease.
It is my disability.
It is my misfortune.
It is my death sentence.
Ghost of YouDown on my knees for you
Begging please stop
Picking the good out of me
Heaving on the floor
I need you
But you're killing me
I look in the mirror
My reflection beckons back
Who is she?
Someone falling through the cracks,
That you have made in her broken heart
Someone begging on her knees for you to shut up
Just a girl who wants to be beautiful
Just running from the edge
Into this world unknown
Finding nobody, but the ghost of you...
Always DefeatedI just run; faster than the wind. I can't stay. I won't.
All of this hurts
To remain standing, when all I am, is torn down.
Can you hear my screams?
Or just the silence
As I take a step into the unknown, will you hold my hand? Will you ever believe in me?
I keep trying but, all those words spoken, make me want to cry; to give up and to let go of all I know.
And you know the pain never stops. It's like a never ending empty void, which is sucking me in and I wonder when this will be done.
Will I be the one who won?
Or will I be the loser everyone knows me to be?
DeceptionA rubber band on my wrist,
A fake smile blurred over my mouth,
The words "I'm fine" are really a shout.
You have no idea what it means,
I hide it all so well,
But not everything's always as it seems.
Fooled by deception, fooled by lies,
The invisible mask is a great disguise.
Clever I am, clever I'm not,
The truth is what's being sought.
I FellI fell down into a hole of despair,
and felt a pain that no one can bear.
Lost in the dark and stuck without a way,
I feel less pain the longer I stay.
My feelings and emotions are slowly numbing,
my hopes and my dreams are already crumbling.
I fell down and now I can't get back up,
now all I can see is a half empty cup.
Lost my strength and lost my will,
all I can do now is just stay still.
I look up to see the bright eyes,
staring at me while my soul slowly dies.
One step and another yet I still can't see the light,
another step, and I fall back into the night.
Here is a darkness I cannot stand,
my hope is holding on by the last strand.
Someone save me before I completely lose my way,
please don't leave me here for another day...
Schemecuts and scars
and iron bars
break free from your chains
dance when it rains
be who you're supposed to be
break the tunnel vision to see
you are more than what you think
you can swim instead of sink
believe in what you know
but question it though
things are not always what they seem
some are nothing more than a dream
you can find yourself in the strangest place
it's something you're supposed to face
every moment of every day
it's supposed to happen that way
and who you are and who you were
is the exact thing that's supposed to occur
live life to fullest, live to the extreme
cuz you don't know if tomorrow is in the scheme
Where We BelongI wan't to write a happy song
I'm looking for my happy place
But everything's gone wrong
Life slapped me in the face
I'm still trying to find myself
It's not in the reflections of their eyes
There's just one who can help
But they'll never realize
I miss that old life
But you're still mine
I'm promised by this knife
That was my given sign
Forever and ever
It's where we belong
To be together
Nothing can go wrong
To look in your eyes
The most beautiful place
And that'll be my prize
Your beautiful face
Don't Kid YourselfDon't kid yourself that I'm happy.
My heart hurts
My eyes water
My soul is scarred
My skin is a concrete wall,
Protecting the porcelain doll within
I don't want to be this way.
I want happiness
I want joy
I want to wake up smiling
I want to go to sleep content
I want a day filled with real laughter,
Not that I force.
People laugh at me
They say that I'm young and I will be happy eventually,
And I believe that is true
But that doesn't mean I want to spend until then feeling this way
Autumn AgainBrand new sweater
I don't know
Leave the house
Brand new sweater
Look At MeLook at the girl in front of you.
What do you see?
An emo girl with no fashion sense.
A girl with too much eyeliner.
A girl who obviously has no emotions.
You wanna know a secret?
I listen to everything you say.
You can't see me trying so hard to put outfits together.
You can't see the smile when I get my eyeliner just right.
You can't see me starve myself to be perfect.
You call me a slut,
but the guy of my dreams won't even look at me.
You criticize everything I'm wearing,
but I was up planning last night to make sure I looked perfect.
You turn your back when there's a single tear,
but I cry so hard every night while you ignore me.
Look at the girl standing in front of you.
I just wish you could really see me.